Okay - So it's Sheeting with snow here AGAIN in the 'Land of Sog'.
Shaugs has an eye infection: I have a sore head; and Robs is stuck in the cabin with the two of us, contemplating whether or not braving Frostbite and Hypothermia is better than braving TWO males with MAN Symptoms...
As I write, Shaugs is NOW bitching cos he found a PEA in his Fish Pie lunch... and MOTHER has JUST TORN him a new one! Happy Families! So I needed to ask - at what age do I actually lose the will to live anymore??!
You see, the dilemma we are currently facing is, we have a Captain Pee Pee in the house - with a rather rampant fire hose - and NO it ain't me!
Now I don't ever remember being told REPEATEDLY not to whizz on the toilet seat; the walls or (on one rather rare occasion) the bathroom ceiling! I remember just getting on with the 'business at hand' and making sure the bathroom was clean for the next person... BUT - you see, we are currently being baptised in little boy wee... and I'm ready to commit MOIDER...
It's not like he's following by example - I LIFT the toilet seat - put it down again and flush when finished, and - at one point after having the Laparotomy - even resorted to (SKANDAAL) piddling like a lady (oooo I'm a laydee) And that's when I truly discovered the wrath of Shaugs...
Silent midnight runs to the loo have been exchanged with SHRIEKS (akin to something at the Wailing wall in Jerusalem) - followed by rather potty mouthed language!
Yesterday in 'Costa (lotta money) Coffee' He asked me to accompany him to the bathroom - and promptly anointed my shoes and jean pant with holy water! The water might have been holy - but my mouth would've made a sailor blush!
So how DO you get a five year old to 'aim for the water' and make as many bubbles as possible - and then clean up after himself??! (WITHOUT scaring him for life and creating a 'problem') I have taken him aside and had a good ol' father/son chat and we'll have to see how things 'pan out' - so to speak!
Me
-x-
2 comments:
Aw Ryan. I don't need to hear this man... Zack is going to be 3 in a month and I can't even get him to sit on a toilet / potty / training seat. If there's one thing that I despise it's the filthy "boyzone" toilet thang... pee on the seat, the sides of the loo, the 'floor drops', and .... splatter. No thank you!
Please let there be a special 'toilet training' angel looking over our house. And yours too !
Smarties or something equally bright and fun in the loo! Get him to aim at them....if he scores, give him some to eat. Preferably clean ones.
If he misses make him fish the skanky ones out the loo and make him eat those. ;-) wahahahahaha. I crack myself up.
My 3 yrs old has the aim of old William Tell, thank God!
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